Tag Archives: Peace

How to have the holiday you want: Part 1

Most of us experience a great deal of pressure to make the holidays AMAZING. And through a sort of collective amnesia, we also forget all the ways in which past holidays have been challenging, frustrating or even disappointing.

I’d like to suggest that this holiday can contain way more of what you love and less of what you loathe… and that you already have the power to make it so.

Step 1: Desired Feelings
Start by asking yourself, “How do I want to FEEL this holiday season?”
*Note: I learned this question from Danielle LaPorte’s work.

When I asked myself this question, I decided that want to feel:
* Peaceful
* Joyful
* Connection (to others and myself)

Step 2: Getting Specific
Once you’ve chosen HOW you want to feel, think about what specific activities, events and people would help you feel that way. In this step, we are employing our powers of discernment to choose both what we’d like to do and what we don’t want to do. We are choosing wisely.

Under each of your desired holiday feelings, make a list of specific things to do and NOT do. Note: You may want to include small turtle steps you’ll need to take to make an item on your list possible.

Here’s my list: {Note: DP is my partner.}

PEACEFUL:
* Create spaciousness. Not too many things in any one day.
* A cathedral of time on my own to dream about projects including my podcast
* No devices in our bedroom at night
* More quiet in the house + less music, television, podcasts that don’t feel special/meaningful
* 8 hours of sleep + early to bed
* No alarm clocks
* Fewer distractions: less email and social media
* No coaching or structured work during this three-week holiday
* Gift giving: only with DP and on a very small level
* Living this holiday entirely within our financial means
* At holiday meals, I’d like to be nicely full but not stuffed

JOYFUL:
* Loads of time with DP
* Talk to family and friends via phone/Skype/chat
* Sit by the fire (Learn how to use our wood stove + get a temperature gauge)
* Walks down to the Point in Blue Rocks
* Read
* Take photographs
* Read out loud to DP at night (Start with Harry Potter series)
* Have a Christmas tree in Nova Scotia
* Put up Christmas decorations in Nova Scotia + in our apartment in Japan
* Make a yummy meal on Christmas Day
* Watch films that make me happy (Family Stone; Arrival; Guardians of the Galaxy; About Time; La La Land; Moana; Salmon Fishing in the Yemen; Star Wars + Star Trek films)
* Christmas music in moderation (one member of my family enjoys it more than the other): Simply Christmas by Leslie Odom Jr. and White Christmas by Bing Crosby

CONNECTION (Others + Self):
* Give + receive love
* Social time with people we really enjoy
* Meet some interesting new people
* No to social obligations if we are tired or if they feel like work (Listen to my body)
* Christmas cards are completely optional
* Less time online
* Write in my journal

Our Christmas Rituals:
Last week, DP and I had a conversation over breakfast about the kind of Christmas rituals we’d like to observe and create this year. We decided that we’d like to make a traditional Christmas dinner which we’ve never done. We’ll spend Christmas and New Year in Nova Scotia where we have a large, sunny kitchen and an OVEN. {This is not the case in Japan.} In choosing our menu, we talked about the kinds of dishes our mothers prepared for Christmas dinner and, in the next few days, I’ll contact our moms and ask them for recipes so that we can make the most authentic versions of those dishes. When we get to Nova Scotia, we’ll buy a Christmas tree and decorate it ~ another thing we’ve never done. We decided to have our small gift exchange on Christmas morning, followed by a late pancake breakfast which will leave us the whole afternoon to make Christmas dinner at a leisurely, low-stress pace. We’ll attend a neighbour’s party on Christmas Eve and, on Boxing Day, we’ll go to the cinema in Bridgewater. On January 1st, we’ll have Chinese take-out which is a tradition from my father’s extended family. I actually started a Google doc to keep track of our plans and the preliminary steps we need to take before we can create those rituals.
 


Join me tomorrow for Part 2 of How to have the holiday you want.

This was first published as The Sunday Reader. If you’d like to receive these posts directly in your mailbox, every two weeks or so, you can subscribe here.

I’d love for you to share this post with your tender-hearted, like-minded friends.
 

Conversations with Your Life | Challenge: Day 6

“I like stories where women save themselves.” ~ Neil Gaiman

Hello there, dear one.

This is the sixth and final day of the Conversations with Your Life Challenge. Thank you for taking part in this experience.

So, do you have a dream or goal that you’ve been keeping to yourself? Lots of us do… and we make up these elaborate stories to explain why it’s not possible. In today’s challenge, we examine the magical space we create when we stop believing our own lies and begin taking action. That’s such a powerful intersection of our lives.

During the course, I’ll be teaching some very specific skills to help participants dissolve those unwanted thoughts that stop us from taking risks and moving forward.

Big news:
I’ve created a self-study option for this course which includes the lessons and workbooks only. This option is a different price as well. Check it out here ~ the details for the Self Study Course are the bottom of the page.

Over this weekend, look for a short video on Facebook explaining the course.
 

Conversations with Your Life | Challenge: Day 4

Today, you’re invited
to make a list of all
the amazing things
your body does for you
and allows you to do.

List at least 20.

Then celebrate
+ say thank you!


Week 4 of the course with be all about conversations with your body. This is really yummy stuff.
 

Conversations with Your Life Challenge: Day 1

What’s the feeling you’d like to have as you start your day?
{Play with this. How can you fine tune your mornings?}

Week 1: Conversations you can have with your life at HOME.
In this week, there are three essays (in writing + audio versions) about my jade plant, loving your home as it is, and a Martha Beck tool called the 3 Bs. You’ll receive exercises and tools with each essay and a workbook for your good stuff.

Conversations with Your Life begins on Monday 30th October.
 

Conversations with Your Life: 6 Day Challenge

Starting tomorrow, Monday 16th October, I’ll be posting micro versions of a few of the exercises we’ll be doing in my upcoming course.

Each challenge will be posted here, on Facebook and Instagram.

I’d love for you to read the challenges, share and respond. Please participate in whatever way feels right to you.

Wishing you interesting + helpful Conversations with Your Life.
 

Reaching for ourselves

She asked, “How can you tell
if a person really likes herself?”

She’s kind to other people
and she sings sometimes
for no reason
and she’s calm
like a warm day on the lake.
Calm like a lake-sized mirror
reflecting the sky. Two skies.

“And what happens when she isn’t
happy with herself?”

The woman stands at the window
and watches the storm clouds gather
and move across her landscape.
Tornadoes of self-doubt.
Earthquakes of drama.
Aftershocks of gossip.
She worries the storms will
destroy everything she’s built.

But she built the storms too.

She’s always reaching
for the wrong things.

When we reach for things
that aren’t good for us:
food, drugs, alcohol,
too much of anything,
loving the wrong person
or loving the right person
in the wrong way,
the thing
we’re really
reaching for
is ourselves.

We’d like to come home to ourselves.

When we say,
“Hi honey, I’m home”
we’re longing to hear
our own voice respond,
“I’m happy you’re home, love.
How was your day?”

 
*This poem was originally shared in my newsletter, The Sunday Reader. To receive The Sunday Reader directly in your inbox twice a month, you can subscribe here.
 

Tornado People

tornadopeople

Most tornado people
don’t actually know
they’re tornado people
but a few of them suspect.

They begin to notice the wind,
fields of flattened crops,
the feeling of exhaustion.
Friends in hiding.

In Agents of Shield
Skye, an alien on her mother’s side,
accidentally goes through Terrigenesis
and develops seismic abilities
that make her both strong and unstable.

Her anger levels a forest.

When she pulls the force inward
she harms herself.

She needs to find peace.

Locate the still centre of things
and stay there.